Sunday, September 6, 2009

Why say anything at all?

Have you ever had a moment when some random stranger stops you in the somewhere and says something and you have to stop and wonder why they even said anything at all? Or do you think the same thing I do? Like, did their mother ever teach them that sometimes it's best to not say anything at all?

I often have moments like this now that I have a little one again. I get a lot of people who stop to comment on how cute or pretty Ella is when she's with me. And of course she's flashing her big, huge grin when they stop to talk to her. The best part is when they notice her earrings and then ask how old she is. I proceed to say she is almost 11 months old and that is when sometimes I get the strange, rather rude comments. I had one little old lady stop me outside the restroom and say, "My she's awfully little to have her ears pierced." And the woman kept right on walking. I actually stopped and looked behind me, like, was she aiming that comment at me? Of course no one was behind me, so yes, the comment was for my benefit. I laughed and thought, thank god she was far enough away to not hear what response I would have had.

Once again, I was in Wegman's with Ella and had a lady literally follow me down the yogurt aisle commenting on Ella's eyes and smile. I finally stopped pushing the cart and she asked what Ella's name was. I said, "It's Ella Dominique." And the woman says to me, "OH! Ella is so common these days. Wow." And just kept right on going. I have to say I was kind of offended by the comment. Who says things like that? And no offense to older people, but, it is always the older people who feel they can say whatever they want whenever they feel like it. Not everyone, but the ones who have those slap you in the face shocking comments. I like the name Ella, and when Randy and I choose it, it was not common. I think I know of one other Ella and we never see her anymore so who cares, right?

I get a lot of people who aren't afraid to ask about Ella's cyst on her head. But a lot of people assume she got it because she either fell or I tossed her around a bit too much. I love to hear them say, "OH MY GOD! Where did she get that bump?" I say, "It's not a bump, it's a cyst. It's something she will have to have removed very shortly. She was born with it" That is usually the end of the conversation b/c they were probably expecting me to say she knocked her head on a table or something.

As you can tell, I like to shock people. Shock value is what keeps me going.

I had a guy from who we have our TV service come and hook up another unit in the garage for my brother in law, since he is now our current tenant. And he stupidly says, "Would you like me to show you how it works?" I laughed. Was this guy serious? Even in my grungy pj's and dirty hair, carrying around a baby, could he possibly have been hitting on me? Some guys just don't care, right? I'm sorry, after laughing I said, "Sir, we have had this service for 5 years and already have 2 units....and to be quite honest, I don't live in the garage so I don't give a shit if my brother knows how to work it or not. Sorry." Once again, a shocked look and he said, "Oh, can you just sign here then?"

I recently had a member of my family come over unannounced and asked me why I felt the need to vacuum my truck. Probably b/c I have two little kids who eat in this car and it just looks gross after 3 years of NOT vacuuming it out. So s/he said, "Well, just leave it there, it's OK." Oh rrrreeeaaallllyyy, well, I don't know about you but I don't like my car looking like it's a small garbage pit. Plus the vacuum helped drown them out so I didn't have to hear the rude comments. But seriously, why bother asking when you're the one who came over without calling first? It's just not worth it.

Sometimes, it's the people closest to you who say the damnest things. My hubby is the perfect example. I'm always wondering how he makes it thru the day sometimes b/c the things he asks are just so darn stupid or mean. Like, we went somewhere and I wanted something sweet to eat and of course he says, "Your ass is big enough." He should know better than to say that, even when other family members are around b/c I'm VERY good at embarrassing him. So I said to his mother AND stepdad, "Magellan said my butts big and I should watch what I eat." Oooohhhh, he got it good for a good few minutes for that. Did it teach him? Of course not. He's a stubborn guido. I asked him to start the water for Ella's bath one day while I put some clothes away, and he turns to me and says,

"Well, what do you do with Ella?"

I said, "What do you mean, what do I do with her?"

He says, "Where do you put her?"

" can either put her in the bath tub with the water running or sit her on the floor. Are you serious though? This isn't your first kid."

He responds, "Well, I wasn't sure what you did."

Ok, the lightbulb never went off in his head that day b/c who asks things like that. I had to ask him if he did drugs during the work hours and killed off one too many brain cells. But, Randy will be a whole nother topic for a different day. Trust me, I'll have you in tears.