Tasteless Tuesdays!!

Yes, it's back!


Even though I still have a cast and can't type very well, I HAVE to get back to this. The stories have just been building up!

Tasteless stories courtesy of my Transformer:

"Mom, I told you none of the girls in my gym class were cute today. They were all gross!"

"Guess what I did today? I wiped my own butt!!"

"I only like tattooed girls like you,mom."

A Tasteless Story courtesy of my Ladybug:

I often let Ella run around naked after a diaper change or a bath. A few weeks ago, after her bath she started wandering around upstairs. I was getting out a clean diaper and jammies when I realized how quiet it was. NOT a good thing with any toddler. It can only mean trouble. Well, I called out her name with no response. There was no noise coming from mine and Magellan's room, which is odd. Our room is typically the first room she goes to. She enjoys shredding my magazines and rearranging our nightstands. I peaked in the doorway and she was very quiet walking around to the other side of the bed wiping her hands as if they were dirty. Oh boy! All of a sudden out of the corner of my eye I see this brown "pile", and thought Good God the dog shit in the house. Well, as I got closer, putting my shirt over my nose all the while, I realized it was Ella's shit! And I realized she had walked in it, and walked all around our room with poopy bare feet. And remember those dirty hands I mentioned...yup take a guess! I have never been more grossed out in my life. And it takes a lot these days to make my stomach turn. I had to quick grab Ella and give her bath, and manage to clean up the mess before my dog could continue with her snack.

LMAO, how was that for being gone for so long?!